Some of these are "just because."  Most won't have a specific occasion.  I was just feeling frisky (or in some cases NOT) when they were created.

Does This Ass Make My Pants Look Fat?

Not tonight, Honey...Aunt Flo's in town

Ewe Kick Ass

Dumb Ass

Smart Ass

MIssy Was Surprised to Discover She Had Booked Her Vacation At A Nude Ranch

Don't Drink And Date

I Wanted to Teach My Husband How To Wax My Eyebrows But Realized He Would Derive Entirely Too Much Pleasure From It So I Decided Not To Give Him The Satisfaction

I'm Sorry My Dog Peed on Your Garden Gnome

Don't You Hate It When You Have To Go So Badly That You Throw Caution To The Wind And Forego The Seat Cover?

Be The Captain of Your Own Underpants

Heard You Got a New Rack